Modern Parent. You are a trained firefighter and know how to rescue. It is time for you to stop rescuing your wife. 57 other people have greater ideas than mine. If your wife does go on some anxiety medication, the breast feeding issue gets solved because your daughter will spit it out. The long-term effects of an anxious attachment style by parents needs to be nipped in the bud.

Children will have other caregivers as they grow, and it is time to create a transition plan for when you go back to work (you are a strategist). A big family meeting with your mom and her mom (or whoever is trusted) is a start. As to the formula issue, there are many kinds (or goat milk) and different bottle types.